"- seasonal depression month 3 of 5"

I do not feel alive today.

my roots are tired of

r e a c h i n g

for water they know is not there,

and won’t be there

til the red oak buds reach

the size of a mouse’s ear.

but in an act of subversive joy

I reach my cheek upward.

My neck cranes to catch

the sun’s soft light

in my weary eyes

anyway,

knowing

eventually

my roots will find water

somewhere deep in this darkness,

and I will grow

again.

- seasonal depression month 3 of 5

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I wrote this poem on a particularly hard day of managing Seasonal Affective Disorder a few weeks ago. It is month 3 of 5 of the coldest and darkest months in the mountains, and I’m feeling it.

According to our garden notes from last year, daffodils broke ground on February 12th, which is today. The season is a little bit behind this year, for our daffodils by our shed have not peeped their heads out of the ground yet, but they are coming.

Green growth is coming, my friends. Take time to feel the depths of this hard winter, but know that you’re going to make it through.

You are not alone.

Your roots will find water, and you, too, will grow again. You can do this.

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Cheers to the journey, and may your Spirit always reside in a state of wonder.